I was thinking that I was employed by the Army, but after the summer I have had I can't help but to wonder if that is true or just a rumor....man basic training felt so real!! I can honestly say that the entire summer I worked 3 weeks....that was it!! But I have endure some of the most painful times of my life....a foot surgery, infection that followed, waiting for the deep wound to heal, learning to walk all over, getting fitted for permanent inserts and finally dealing with the massive amount of scar tissue that is still there making simple tasks such as a museum visit pure torture at times....that was just the foot....I also had a particle hysterectomy we won't begin to go into the healing process there, all I am going to say is child birth was a walk in the park compared to this!! So I have officially been down for the count!!
I am due to come off my final convalescent leave on Saturday and sign back into the Unit. When I go back I will have my deploy able status back and will be hopefully operating at close to a 100%. I am excited to get back into the swing of things, to go back to working full time and working out like I had come to love! But at the same time I am going to miss my one on one time with Moo and all the time we have got to spend as a family. I truly love being a mom and wife....but I have always been one to want more...how can I raise my daughter to go after all her hopes and dreams if I myself was not willing to do the same? I want to be her role model and hero, to both my kids!!
So now I am once again facing that all too familiar feeling of wanting to work, train and deploy but at the same time wanting and needing to be the everything to Mr. Man, Moo and Handsome....someone lied when they said you could have it all....so not true!! But this is the life I lead and I would not have it any other way....
What are the struggles you face in everyday life? What tears at your heart strings but still you press forward?
I think that you are doing a great job balancing everything.... especially balancing family time and the time you so obviously needed to heal up from your surgeries.
ReplyDeleteI don't really know that I face any struggles *every* day.... but the thing that tears at my heartstrings every day is something you and I have talked about a lot: having babies. It makes me very emotional to hear about so many women who get pregnant so easily - so many without even trying - while some of us struggle with it every month. It's a rough journey - which I know will have a happy ending some day. I think the hardest thing is knowing how much my husband wants to be a Daddy.... and knowing we could provide a loving, safe home for a precious little baby... but not actually being able to attain that yet. Still I press on every day... knowing that my angel is on their way - whether biologically or from adoption. Patience is a virtue - but it's hard for me.